I’m Frankie Truman, and this is your exclusive urbanreflex.com round-up of the
opening stages of the World Soccer Cup competition of 2002!
Well, the first round of the competition is over and what a thrilling two weeks of
soccer football action it’s been! The best teams in the world have come together to
put on a dazzling display of stunning soccer skills.
The undoubted highlight of the tournament so far has to be USA v. Poland. This
game was electrifying, with both teams kicking the ball almost constantly.
The USA dominated the team from the Communist state, scoring headed pass
after headed pass. It was only by pure chance that Poland managed to score three
goal-strikes against us. But it didn’t matter in the end: USA qualify on points!
Go Team USA!
The Polish side were understandably frustrated at winning a game 3-zero yet
still being eliminated from the competition. But you know what Frankie Truman
says to that? ‘Go tell it to Stalin, you pinkos! That’s a taste of democracy for ya!’
—Strike! The mighty USA devastate Portugania
Elsewhere in the first round, Great Britain, the ‘Queen’ of world soccer, faced
off their old adversaries The People’s Republic of Argentinia. I hate to say this to
my British readers, but boy, was this a boring game! Sure, the Brits played with
discipline, ratching up a huge number of strong kicks but they failed to bring the
game to life with any goal-strikes even after 40 minutes of play!
The British scored over 200 kicks in the first half, compared with just 120 for the
Argentineans. Total yardage gained was in Britain’s favor but the South
Americans easily weathered the Limey storm in a teacup.
It has to be said that for a nation of impoverished street-fighters, the Argentineans
showed great physical skills. Their complex diving movements, on and off the ball,
were far superior to that of their British counterparts.
But late into the first quarter, Britain’s Owen Michaels sprinted into the
Argentinean goal-scoring area and was met with a firm, off-the-ball defensive
tackle by Argentinia’s Carlos Somebody (please check name, Trudi – Frank).
—Argh! Britain’s Owen Michaels.
Even though the contact was slight and no blood was visible, the umpire decided
to award a penalising kick for Britain. World-renowned wing man David Beckman
stepped up and easily placed the ball into the net with his foot. Not surprising,
seeing as none of the Argentinean players tried to tackle him! What is up with you
guys? You’re never gonna win the World Soccer Cup playing like that, take it
Great Britain now progress to the second stage where they face Denmark, the
first country from Sweden ever to reach the knockout stages of the tournament.
Host nation Japan, who also play as South Korea, put on a fine show, as befits
the nation who invented soccer football in 1976. The Japanese matches have all
been great entertainment, and watching those little guys running around furiously
as they try to reach the ball has been truly hilarious. If only all the matches could
be this much fun!
Japan/South Korea now go on to face Turkey, the first country from the
Austro-Hungarian Empire ever to reach the second round.
And special praise must be reserved for Brazil, who have shown that being a
Third World country doesn’t mean you can’t be a fairly good soccer-playing
side. Some experts tip them to do well in the competition this year – although
the USA remain firm favorites.
In the second round Brazil will face Belgium, part of the Franco-Belgian
Well, that’s all I got for ya, folks. See you in the second round for more top
soccer football action. This is Frankie Truman, reporting exclusively for
Feedback on Frankie Truman’s coverage of the World Cup can be read here.