NRA Defends Iraq's 'Right To Bear Arms'
 
 

In a surprise development to the current Iraq crisis, America's National Rifle
Association has voted to oppose war with Iraq and issued a statement saying
Saddam Hussein has 'a right to bear arms' which the U.S. government should not
infringe. The unexpected move has shocked political commentators who saw the
NRA as staunchly pro-war.

In a press release, the NRA stated: "For many years now we have been saying
that the United States government should not dictate to our members what
weapons we can and cannot possess and that any attempt to do so is an
infringement on our rights and unconstitutional. After lengthy discussions with
our members and committee members, we have concluded that to be consistent,
we have to oppose any war with Iraq, because the principle at stake is
essentially the same."

The second amendment to the United States Constitution states: 'A well
regulated Militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the
people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.' The exact interpretation
of the amendment has been the subject of debate for decades, with the pro-gun
lobby claiming it gives every citizen the inalienable right to possess weapons for
their own protection.

Saddam Hussein immediately called a press conference at his holiday retreat on
the outskirts of Baghdad, praising the NRA for its "sensible and righteous
decision." Dressed in a novelty T-shirt depicting NRA spokesman Charlton
Heston as Ben Hur, the Iraqi leader held aloft a green canister and told
reporters: "You will take my mustard gas from my cold, dead hands! Praise be
to Allah!" The press conference then swiftly came to and end as reporters
hurriedly made for the exits.

The NRA also unveiled new bumper stickers on its website proclaiming
"Anthrax doesn't kill people, people who release anthrax kill people!" although
a spokesman said these were only a trial and would not be mass produced.

Donald Rumsfeld was unavailable for comment.
 

(c) urbanreflex.com 2003